✎作文范文
happy fathers day
(父亲节快乐)
my dear dad:(我挚爱的爸爸)
today is fathers day.(今天是父亲节)i love my father very much.(我极爱我的父亲)i want to send my best wishes to you.(我要把我的祝福送给您)
i remember all the beautiful times
between us.(我记得我们在一起享有的美妙时光)sush as you hold my hand to see the brilliant sunshine over the land.(比如您牵着我的手看那灿烂阳光沐浴大地) you hold my hand across the flowering forest.(您牵着我的手穿越绿意盎然的大森林)you hold my hand to roam the endless grassland.(您牵着我的手徜徉于无边无际的草原) you hold my hand to play on the white beach near the equators island.(您牵着我的手在赤道小岛的白色沙滩上嬉戏)you hold my hand to visit the great terra-cotta warrious.(您牵着我的手参观宏伟壮观的秦始皇兵马俑) you hold my hand to run into the blue and shining seaside.(您牵着我的手在碧蓝晶莹的海边奔跑)you hold my hand to enjoy the sweet smell of the rain and dew.(您牵着我的手品尝雨露的甘甜)
many many things you are together with me.(如许多的事情，我们在一起经历。)we can count the stars.(我们一起数着星星)we can breathe deeply in the morning.(我们在清晨深深呼吸)we can walk in the dusk.(我们在黄昏漫步)
if you are with me,theres nothing between us.(如果您和我在一起，困难将不值一提)if you are with me,theres peace inside me.(如果您和我在一起，我的内心将充满平静)if you are with me,i will do all i can.(如果您和我在一起，我将尽我所能)
my dear dad,ilove everything of you,(我的好爸爸，我爱您的一切)your handsome(您的帅气),your laughing(您笑声),your words,(您的话语)your step(您的步伐),everything ,you know?(一切的一切，知道吗?)
so ,all together ,happy fathers day!(总之，父亲节快乐)
your dear honey
(您挚爱的甜心)
harry~~~
(哈利)
__.6.17.
(即日)
精选读者点评
名师·深度剖析
作文类型：书信、节日主题作文、双语作文
适合年级：小学五年级、六年级、初中一年级
【成语使用】
无
【形容词】
美丽的、灿烂、碧蓝、晶莹、甘甜、宏伟、壮观、绿意盎然
【好词好句】
1. you hold my hand to roam the endless grassland.
2. we can count the stars.
3. if you are with me, there's peace inside me.
4. your handsome, your laughing, your words, your step, everything, you know?
【修辞手法】
比喻：”you hold my hand to see the brilliant sunshine over the land“，以“灿烂阳光沐浴大地”喻指父爱温暖普照，画面明亮而富有感染力
排比：连续七次使用“you hold my hand to…”构成节奏鲜明的排比，层层铺展亲子共度的美好场景
【文字校对】
• "sush"应为"such"
• "terra-cotta warrious"应为"terracotta warriors"
• "ilove"应为"i love"
• "honey"在中文语境中宜译为“宝贝”更贴切，但作为昵称属可接受表达，不作硬性修正
【写作亮点】
✓ 双语自然穿插，中英文对应工整，体现语言实践能力
✓ 以“牵手”为贯穿意象，情感具象、线索清晰、结构凝练
✓ 多组短句并列与重复句式交织，形成如歌谣般的韵律感
✓ 末段用排比罗列父亲的细节特征，真挚细腻，极具生活温度
