✎作文范文
last sunday,i visited my grandmother.we listened to music and planted flowers.i counted the flowers.there were ten..then i helped my grandmother cook lunch.when we finished,i washed the dishes and she cleaned the kitchen.in the evening,i watched tv and played the violin at home,it was fun.
上星期日，我拜访了我的祖母，我们听音乐，种植花卉，我数了十个..然后我帮我的奶奶做午饭。当我们结束了，我洗餐具和她打扫厨房。在晚上，我看电视，并在家里演奏小提琴，它是乐趣。
精选读者点评
名师·深度剖析
作文类型：记叙文、双语作文
适合年级：小学三年级、小学四年级、小学五年级
【成语使用】
【形容词】
fun、ten、evening、home、lunch
【好词好句】
1. last sunday, i visited my grandmother.
2. we listened to music and planted flowers.
3. in the evening, i watched tv and played the violin at home, it was fun.
【修辞手法】
【文字校对】
• "ten."应为"ten."
• "it was fun."应为"it was fun."
• "we finished,i washed"应为"we finished, i washed"
• "played the violin at home,it was fun."应为"played the violin at home. it was fun."
【写作亮点】
✓ 时间线索清晰，以“last sunday”“then”“in the evening”自然串联事件
✓ 动作描写简洁连贯，动词选用准确（visited、listened、planted、counted、helped、washed、cleaned、watched、played）
✓ 中英双语对照呈现，体现语言实践意识
✓ 生活化选材真实质朴，富有童趣与亲情温度