✎作文范文
小时候可以自由的玩耍，不用去担心未来的前途，不用为作业烦恼，而现在各科的作业、考试使得我不能从事运动，不能做自己喜欢的事，我不要长大，我想自由的飞。
i want to fly
when i was a little child, i didn have to worry about my homework. i didn need to think about my future. now, the homework and tests of each subject are numerous that i can have sports and do my favourite things. i don want to grow up. i want to fly freely.
精选读者点评
名师·深度剖析
作文类型：抒情散文、双语习作
【形容词】
自由的、未来的、 numerous、 favourite、freely
【好词好句】
1. “小时候可以自由的玩耍，不用去担心未来的前途，不用为作业烦恼”
2. “我不要长大，我想自由的飞。”
3. “i want to fly”
【修辞手法】
比喻：[“我想自由的飞”以“飞”喻指挣脱束缚、回归本真的精神状态]
【文字校对】
• "i didn have"应为"i didn't have"
• "i didn need"应为"i didn't need"
• "are numerous that i can have sports"应为"are so numerous that i can't have sports"
• "i don want"应为"i don't want"
【写作亮点】
✓ 中英双语自然穿插，体现语言表达的个性与尝试
✓ 用对比手法凸显童年与当下的心理落差，情感真挚
✓ 短句节奏明快，“我不要长大，我想自由的飞”富有感染力
✓ 核心意象“飞”贯穿中英文段落，形成结构呼应